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lederhosenEvery so often, I remember to be annoyed by Jack Chick's website. I was originally going to make this a webquiz so I could annoy the rest of you as well, but I can't think of good questions. So this is a minimalist webquiz: pick your own answer. I've included a link to one example with each of these; with the exception of the Roleplayer, there are more to be found on Chick's site.
Pretty self-explanatory. You're dying of something slow and lingering. Maybe because you foolishly trusted to condoms to protect you from AIDS, maybe you just got unlucky. But in the end, it's OK that you're dying a protracted unpleasant death, because you're bound to Get Saved.
Well, not really an evolutionist, because you don't seem to have read any modern evolutionary theory. But if you had, you wouldn't make such a handy strawman for the Preaching Youth.
You spend most of your time sitting in a big chair explaining to people why they're going to Hell, and you have a blank oval for a face. All the same, if you or any of your friends are reading my LiveJournal, I would like to make it clear that I have no beef against Christians. What I'm mocking here is Jack Chick's reliance on tired old stereotypes recycled ad nauseam. That, and his inability to do basic research on anything before attacking it.
You came so close! You heard the word of God, and you said you'd think about it, but died before coming to a decision. Shame, that, but it's what you get for stopping to think about things.
If you're young and pretty, you might yet be saved, but if you're butch (male or female) you're doomed. And not just to a life of bad fashion sense, either.
When in Heaven, you have a featureless oval for a face, just like your father. Maybe you got bored of this? But for some odd reason, Chick seems to be reluctant to draw your face, preferring to cut-and-paste from somewhere else when he's not leaving it blank.
You've been hoodwinked by the Catholics into worshipping a false god. Also, you're likely to get the crap kicked out of you for your beliefs, but you can solve this problem by changing your beliefs.
It's all J.K. Rowling's fault. Usually female, you thought magic was fun and then found yourself trapped in a nightmare of evil. As long as you're young and pretty, you have a good chance of being redeemed. But if you're over 20, you're doomed.
Clean-cut, good-looking, well-dressed, you have all the answers before you're twenty. Sometimes your friends listen to you, sometimes they don't, but you always give them the chance.
Not really a stereotype, since you only show up in one out-of-print tract, but you're one of Jack's most memorable creations. Strictly speaking, you're a subcategory of the Pagan/Witch, though you may not know it yet.
Possibly Jack's most-recycled character, you were a big mean ugly swearin' cursin' drinkin' fightin' machine with facial scars and a three-day growth, until you met Jesus. Now you're a big mean Servant of God.
Boy, does Jack ever have it in for YOU.
- Which Jack Chick stereotype are you?
Pretty self-explanatory. You're dying of something slow and lingering. Maybe because you foolishly trusted to condoms to protect you from AIDS, maybe you just got unlucky. But in the end, it's OK that you're dying a protracted unpleasant death, because you're bound to Get Saved.
Well, not really an evolutionist, because you don't seem to have read any modern evolutionary theory. But if you had, you wouldn't make such a handy strawman for the Preaching Youth.
You spend most of your time sitting in a big chair explaining to people why they're going to Hell, and you have a blank oval for a face. All the same, if you or any of your friends are reading my LiveJournal, I would like to make it clear that I have no beef against Christians. What I'm mocking here is Jack Chick's reliance on tired old stereotypes recycled ad nauseam. That, and his inability to do basic research on anything before attacking it.
You came so close! You heard the word of God, and you said you'd think about it, but died before coming to a decision. Shame, that, but it's what you get for stopping to think about things.
If you're young and pretty, you might yet be saved, but if you're butch (male or female) you're doomed. And not just to a life of bad fashion sense, either.
When in Heaven, you have a featureless oval for a face, just like your father. Maybe you got bored of this? But for some odd reason, Chick seems to be reluctant to draw your face, preferring to cut-and-paste from somewhere else when he's not leaving it blank.
You've been hoodwinked by the Catholics into worshipping a false god. Also, you're likely to get the crap kicked out of you for your beliefs, but you can solve this problem by changing your beliefs.
It's all J.K. Rowling's fault. Usually female, you thought magic was fun and then found yourself trapped in a nightmare of evil. As long as you're young and pretty, you have a good chance of being redeemed. But if you're over 20, you're doomed.
Clean-cut, good-looking, well-dressed, you have all the answers before you're twenty. Sometimes your friends listen to you, sometimes they don't, but you always give them the chance.
Not really a stereotype, since you only show up in one out-of-print tract, but you're one of Jack's most memorable creations. Strictly speaking, you're a subcategory of the Pagan/Witch, though you may not know it yet.
Possibly Jack's most-recycled character, you were a big mean ugly swearin' cursin' drinkin' fightin' machine with facial scars and a three-day growth, until you met Jesus. Now you're a big mean Servant of God.
Boy, does Jack ever have it in for YOU.
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My browser loves me...
Date: 2003-07-03 11:56 pm (UTC)Which is good, because I know they would only raise my blood pressure...
You know, I find the anti-catholic thing so very much more offensive than any of Chick's other stuff, despite identifying a lot better with his evil role-playing-thinking-too-much-witchy-evolutionists. Perhaps because it really drives home the message that this isn't about christianity, it is about a very, very specific subset of christianity which lacks even the charity to appreciate other christians?
I find it especially obnoxious. I guess I don't expect understanding of more fringey groups by fundie types, but surely a little bit of acceptance of other christian groups would not be unreasonable? Or are they saying it isn't about believing, sincerely, in the correct God, it is about worshipping him in exactly the way we do?
Grrr... this isn't a very coherent rant, but I trust the message is getting across...
Catherine (who was discussing with her fellow choristers last night the fact that Catholics have it easier, because they get to sing in latin, rather than in awful English translations that don't scan properly to the notes...)
Re: My browser loves me...
Date: 2003-07-03 11:58 pm (UTC)Yeah, Chick's site seems to be temporarily down. I didn't do it.
Re: My browser loves me...
Date: 2003-07-04 09:34 am (UTC)Why doesn't this surprise me?
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Date: 2003-07-04 01:21 am (UTC)Wait a minute. I can feel another spoof coming on.
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Date: 2003-07-04 06:00 am (UTC)Have you seen this comic (http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp05242003.html)? (And the story underneath it.)
lonecat.
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Date: 2003-07-04 06:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-07-12 10:59 pm (UTC)Ah, Anthony Grigor-Scott... I've encountered this person when I was looking up some historical material on the Khazar Jews. Didn't take me long to realize that he has a rather blinkered view of the world.
I found out later that he does have a degree of fame.
http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Lobby/7573/auspkook.html
no subject
Date: 2003-07-04 09:37 am (UTC)The Angel
You spend all day tossing sinners underhand into the fiery pit of damnation.
The angel is my favorite, although I know that I am, of course, a somewhat more well-read version of the Evolutionist.
no subject
Date: 2003-07-04 03:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-07-04 10:55 pm (UTC)But first you take them up to the gates of Heaven, just close enough for them to think they might be saved...
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Date: 2003-07-07 08:45 am (UTC)Good quiz. Mind if I linked to it through my journal?
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Date: 2003-07-07 03:49 pm (UTC)(I think just about *any* evolutionist is better-read than Chick's, though. The epitome of the straw-man, that.)