Review - Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
Sep. 14th, 2008 09:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lederhosenErm... some of the costumes were good?
It had most of the same ingredients as the first two (I'd never seen #2, so we watched it on DVD afterwards) but it didn't put them together properly. The first two went better with a bit of humour, but here the cutesy dialogue developed into a full-fledged case of George Lucas Syndrome.
Plus, stuff that made no sense:
- Pretty much anything connected with magic. Yes, there is a difference between "magic doesn't have to obey the laws of nature" and "magic has no internal logic or consistency, and coincides with whatever we need to take us to the next special effect". In particular:
- If you were cursing a tyrant who'd just betrayed you, why exactly would it seem like a good idea for the curse to come with a handy Army of the Undead?
- "Once they cross the wall they will become invulnerable" - WTF? No attempt at even symbolic rationalisation here, just "um, magic! Hey look, a special effect!"
- Ancient Chinese Heroine gets stabbed in the emperor's palace, and looks pretty badly hurt. Later, she tells us that she would've died except the yeti came and took her to Shangri-La. What the hell were the yeti doing at the palace, which features a prominent absence of snow?
- Why does Ancient Chinese Villain cast his spells in subtitled Chinese, while Ancient Chinese Heroine casts hers in English? Even when summoning up an army of ancient Chinese dead?
- Where did said army get their weapons from? I'm pretty sure they weren't buried with them.
- Shouldn't their general have been missing two more limbs? Maybe the tearing-apart-by-horses team got bored and decided to stop after the first arm came off, but that seems like lazy, sloppy work to me.
- Speaking of the general... this is a guy who was a loyal servant of the tyrannical emperor. As his most trusted general, presumably he was the guy who led the emperor's armies to conquer and enslave the poor beggars who died building the Wall in the first place, and he was quite happy to continue serving the emperor right up to the point where he took a shine to the emperor's intended. So how does he suddenly become the hero leading the Wall's dead to freedom?
- When I am an evil supernatural being, and I gain possession of the one weapon in the universe that can destroy me, perhaps I will hide it somewhere secret, or perhaps I will use my powers to destroy it on the spot. ON NO ACCOUNT will I throw it at the people who are trying to destroy me.
It had most of the same ingredients as the first two (I'd never seen #2, so we watched it on DVD afterwards) but it didn't put them together properly. The first two went better with a bit of humour, but here the cutesy dialogue developed into a full-fledged case of George Lucas Syndrome.
Plus, stuff that made no sense:
- Pretty much anything connected with magic. Yes, there is a difference between "magic doesn't have to obey the laws of nature" and "magic has no internal logic or consistency, and coincides with whatever we need to take us to the next special effect". In particular:
- If you were cursing a tyrant who'd just betrayed you, why exactly would it seem like a good idea for the curse to come with a handy Army of the Undead?
- "Once they cross the wall they will become invulnerable" - WTF? No attempt at even symbolic rationalisation here, just "um, magic! Hey look, a special effect!"
- Ancient Chinese Heroine gets stabbed in the emperor's palace, and looks pretty badly hurt. Later, she tells us that she would've died except the yeti came and took her to Shangri-La. What the hell were the yeti doing at the palace, which features a prominent absence of snow?
- Why does Ancient Chinese Villain cast his spells in subtitled Chinese, while Ancient Chinese Heroine casts hers in English? Even when summoning up an army of ancient Chinese dead?
- Where did said army get their weapons from? I'm pretty sure they weren't buried with them.
- Shouldn't their general have been missing two more limbs? Maybe the tearing-apart-by-horses team got bored and decided to stop after the first arm came off, but that seems like lazy, sloppy work to me.
- Speaking of the general... this is a guy who was a loyal servant of the tyrannical emperor. As his most trusted general, presumably he was the guy who led the emperor's armies to conquer and enslave the poor beggars who died building the Wall in the first place, and he was quite happy to continue serving the emperor right up to the point where he took a shine to the emperor's intended. So how does he suddenly become the hero leading the Wall's dead to freedom?
- When I am an evil supernatural being, and I gain possession of the one weapon in the universe that can destroy me, perhaps I will hide it somewhere secret, or perhaps I will use my powers to destroy it on the spot. ON NO ACCOUNT will I throw it at the people who are trying to destroy me.
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Date: 2008-09-14 01:30 am (UTC)...
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Date: 2008-09-14 06:06 pm (UTC)Yeah, what's up with that? Hmm, maybe he's not completely supernatural yet.
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Date: 2008-09-14 10:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-15 01:03 pm (UTC)Unnatural != Supernatural, or so I'm told...
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Date: 2008-09-14 02:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-14 03:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-14 05:26 am (UTC)