Carols

[lederhosen]

This started out on Twitter, but I think I'll crosspost it here. Blame @LeVostreGC, who started the #carolswithspiders hashtag.

You know Bird-Catcher, Bug-Snatcher, Lurker and Hairy
Sits-In-Your-Window and Bites-The-Unwary
But have you ever met
The creepiest arthropod yet?

Crawly the Eight-Legg'd Monster
Grew to quite unusual size
She liked to lurk in cupboards
And watch with glitt'ring compound eyes

Mostly she fed on rodents
Liquefying their insides
Slurping them out with gusto
'midst their shrivelled husks she'd hide

But sometimes if she'd fed enough
And felt like acting grand
She'd paralyse them, tie them up
And read them all Ayn Rand.