Those wacky Creation Scientists
Nov. 8th, 2005 01:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lederhosenThe Twin Cities Creation Science Association offers a splendidly useful list of topics for kids entering science fairs. Some of the highlights:
The intro is a bit shaky:
Sir John Thomas discovered the electron.
That would be Sir Joseph John Thompson. (I did once attend a very good lecture by a scientist who really did have the misfortune to be named 'John Thomas', but he didn't discover the electron.)
Petr Beckmann, a Polish professor who defected to the U.S. during the Cold War, has raised serious questions about Einsteinian physics and has shown that science based on solid experimental data is superior to many of Einstein's theories.
I'd never heard of Beckmann, but Wikipedia came to the rescue: "Beckmann was also a frequent and colorful participant in Usenet debates. In them, he claimed to have debunked Albert Einstein's theory of relativity in his book Einstein Plus 2, as well as in another self-published journal, Galilean Electrodynamics."
Anybody who's spent time on Usenet knows what 'a frequent and colorful participant in Usenet debates' is a euphemism for, particularly when coupled with 'claimed to have debunked relativity'. And when, oh when, will those wacky anti-relativists explain why it is that GPS systems need to include relativistic corrections to get the right answers?
But the topics themselves are often hilarious:
- Make a computer model of the Flood currents.
- How much voltage or current can a human take before he is killed? Could do experiments on a plant.
- Make an experiment to show how Boyle's law applies to nebula.
- Trilobites prove Noah's flood because they are curled up or not?
- Is intelligence influenced by physical attributes. i.e. are blondes "dumb" or does skin color influence intelligence? (One last time, folks: 'i.e.' = 'that is', 'e.g.' = 'for example'. DO NOT confuse them.}
- Can a dog run a maze faster than a gerbil?
- Could a person function without thumbs? or What would it be like to not have thumbs?
- Does sea currents affect climate? Am me passed English Grammar 101?
- Is everything, including non-living things, made of cells?
- Why is blood blue in our veins but turns red when we are cut? If we are cut in a vacuum would the blood stay blue? Isn't it heartwarming to know that the people who want to tell us how life on Earth came about don't know what colour the blood in their own veins is?
- Were all the animals friendly to man before the Flood? Idea: raise several baby animals like snake and mouse together to see if they remain friends as they are older.
- Why do only mammals have hair? I'll answer that question when you show me the nipples on a red-kneed tarantula.
- Why do plants give us oxygen? When's the last time a Triffid knocked on your door and said "hey, dude, I made you some oxygen!"
- What color is our brain? This could be a really satisfying experiment, if brief.
- Why do cats always land on there feet when they fall? Do other animals do this? Aside from the bad spelling, I don't like where this is headed...
- How do mice react after 24 hours of confinement? What about other animals? For bonus points, how long can you keep them confined without access to a lawyer?
- What is God made of?
- How do we get headaches? After reading this list, I've got a pretty good idea.
- Why did God make pests like bugs and mosquitoes? Because without them, all His work on malaria, dengue fever, and sleeping sickness would've been wasted.
- Why do people believe in Evolution?
- What events caused them to become evolutionists? I was abused by satanic D&D-playing paleontologists.
- Why do we have pimples? Did God goof? Somehow, I'm guessing that there is a 'wrong answer' to this question.
- Why do cats hate dogs and dogs hate cats? Trick question - cats aren't in the Bible!
(In fairness, the author does note that "these are the raw questions [from a kids' brainstorming session] as I have not had time to clean them up or rephrase them in a statement for a hypothesis", but since it's dated five years ago that excuse doesn't hold too much water.)
In related news, closing arguments from the plaintiffs' lawyer in the Dover case. Yay him.
And unrelated, when pranking gets out of hand.
The intro is a bit shaky:
Sir John Thomas discovered the electron.
That would be Sir Joseph John Thompson. (I did once attend a very good lecture by a scientist who really did have the misfortune to be named 'John Thomas', but he didn't discover the electron.)
Petr Beckmann, a Polish professor who defected to the U.S. during the Cold War, has raised serious questions about Einsteinian physics and has shown that science based on solid experimental data is superior to many of Einstein's theories.
I'd never heard of Beckmann, but Wikipedia came to the rescue: "Beckmann was also a frequent and colorful participant in Usenet debates. In them, he claimed to have debunked Albert Einstein's theory of relativity in his book Einstein Plus 2, as well as in another self-published journal, Galilean Electrodynamics."
Anybody who's spent time on Usenet knows what 'a frequent and colorful participant in Usenet debates' is a euphemism for, particularly when coupled with 'claimed to have debunked relativity'. And when, oh when, will those wacky anti-relativists explain why it is that GPS systems need to include relativistic corrections to get the right answers?
But the topics themselves are often hilarious:
- Make a computer model of the Flood currents.
- How much voltage or current can a human take before he is killed? Could do experiments on a plant.
- Make an experiment to show how Boyle's law applies to nebula.
- Trilobites prove Noah's flood because they are curled up or not?
- Is intelligence influenced by physical attributes. i.e. are blondes "dumb" or does skin color influence intelligence? (One last time, folks: 'i.e.' = 'that is', 'e.g.' = 'for example'. DO NOT confuse them.}
- Can a dog run a maze faster than a gerbil?
- Could a person function without thumbs? or What would it be like to not have thumbs?
- Does sea currents affect climate? Am me passed English Grammar 101?
- Is everything, including non-living things, made of cells?
- Why is blood blue in our veins but turns red when we are cut? If we are cut in a vacuum would the blood stay blue? Isn't it heartwarming to know that the people who want to tell us how life on Earth came about don't know what colour the blood in their own veins is?
- Were all the animals friendly to man before the Flood? Idea: raise several baby animals like snake and mouse together to see if they remain friends as they are older.
- Why do only mammals have hair? I'll answer that question when you show me the nipples on a red-kneed tarantula.
- Why do plants give us oxygen? When's the last time a Triffid knocked on your door and said "hey, dude, I made you some oxygen!"
- What color is our brain? This could be a really satisfying experiment, if brief.
- Why do cats always land on there feet when they fall? Do other animals do this? Aside from the bad spelling, I don't like where this is headed...
- How do mice react after 24 hours of confinement? What about other animals? For bonus points, how long can you keep them confined without access to a lawyer?
- What is God made of?
- How do we get headaches? After reading this list, I've got a pretty good idea.
- Why did God make pests like bugs and mosquitoes? Because without them, all His work on malaria, dengue fever, and sleeping sickness would've been wasted.
- Why do people believe in Evolution?
- What events caused them to become evolutionists? I was abused by satanic D&D-playing paleontologists.
- Why do we have pimples? Did God goof? Somehow, I'm guessing that there is a 'wrong answer' to this question.
- Why do cats hate dogs and dogs hate cats? Trick question - cats aren't in the Bible!
(In fairness, the author does note that "these are the raw questions [from a kids' brainstorming session] as I have not had time to clean them up or rephrase them in a statement for a hypothesis", but since it's dated five years ago that excuse doesn't hold too much water.)
In related news, closing arguments from the plaintiffs' lawyer in the Dover case. Yay him.
And unrelated, when pranking gets out of hand.
